College Transitions: How to Manage Stress Away From Home

Starting college is supposed to be one of the most exciting times of your life - or at least that’s what everyone told me. But my first year? Honestly, it was the shittiest year I can remember. I felt completely out of place, isolated, and deeply depressed. I didn’t click with the school I chose, I struggled to find my people, and every day felt heavier than the last. Eventually, I made the decision to transfer out, and it was one of the best choices I’ve ever made.

I share this because I know firsthand how overwhelming and lonely college can feel. Even though social media makes it look like everyone else is thriving, the truth is a lot of students are struggling quietly. If that’s you, you’re not alone.

Why the Transition Feels So Hard

Leaving home means leaving behind the routines and support systems that gave you stability. Suddenly, you’re juggling:

• Academic pressure — classes that are harder than expected and deadlines that pile up fast.

• Social changes — feeling like you’re supposed to instantly make best friends when in reality, it takes time.

• Total independence — meals, money, laundry, time management… it’s a crash course in adulthood.

• Homesickness — missing family, pets, or even the comfort of knowing where you belong.

I didn’t realize how much I’d taken my support system for granted until it was gone - and I had no idea how to rebuild it at first.

Coping Strategies That Help

Looking back (and now, as a therapist who supports college students), here are some things I wish I’d known my first year:

1. Create some kind of routine
   Even just setting a sleep schedule and a regular meal plan helps calm anxiety. Chaos feels worse without structure.

2. Find your people - even if it takes time
   I know how hard it feels when it seems like everyone else already has their group. Clubs, campus events, or even one meaningful friendship can make a difference.

3. Stay connected to home - but not too much
   I used to call my long distance boyfriend constantly, which gave me comfort but also made it harder to settle in. Balance connection with giving yourself space to grow.

4. Use campus resources early
   Counseling centers, peer support, tutoring - these are there for a reason. You don’t need to wait until you’re drowning.

5. Practice grounding skills
   When in recovery, practicing art/creativity and making sure I moved around/exercised helped a lot. For others, it’s deep breathing, meditation, or journaling.

6. Give yourself permission to make changes
   Sometimes the best choice is transferring, changing your major, or shifting direction. Your first choice doesn’t have to be your forever choice.

You Don’t Have to Do It Alone

If your stress feels unmanageable or your mental health is slipping, therapy can help. College is a season of growth, but growth is messy and uncomfortable. Having someone in your corner - who truly gets how isolating and overwhelming it can be - makes all the difference.

I didn’t have that kind of support my first year, and I wish I had. You don’t need to push through it on your own.

If you’re a college student navigating stress, anxiety, or just feeling stuck, know that support is out there. You deserve to feel lighter, calmer, and more yourself again.

Gabrielle Eichler-Len, RMHCI